MAN fights back against the Northman curse

If you haven’t read this letter sent to the site yet, you must.  A man — conveniently named “John” (Doe perhaps?) — addresses an open letter to Alexander Skarsgard for what Eric Northman has done to the women in John’s life.  Including even his mother.

Terribly funny and all in good fun!

A taste to lure you…read the rest on

Mr. Skarsgård:

My name is John.  You don’t know me but I know you.  Not by choice.  You have been shoved, very forcefully, down my throat since 2008.  I, being an American, knew absolutely nothing of you other than you were the new eye candy on some up and coming TV show.

….if I had only known.

You see sir.  May I call you sir?  Excellent.  You see sir, what I thought to be nothing more than a simple star-crush for many women turned out to be some sort of curse.  How was I to know that every single woman I had ever known or would ever know would now put me up to the “Eric Northman” Challenge?  HOW COULD I HAVE KNOWN!?

I apologize for my outburst…but this is severely emotional.  No man can live up to you, you’re not human.  You’re a bioengineered, genetically altered being grown in some sinister Swedish laboratory using DNA taken from the Shroud of Turin!!!!

…of course this is only a working theory…  I’ve no “proof” as of yet.


One response to “MAN fights back against the Northman curse

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